Monday, May 08, 2006

In defensione meo pars primus

And so I beginne my conter-apele to Maistre Chaucere.

ITEM. Thou hast removede mencioun of me from the secounde drafte of thyn confessio amantis. WTF!?! & hereof I appeale thee John Gowere that thou art a wanker.

1. Thys be a dissevable accusynge, as al and sondrie wiste that thysse seconde drafte was publysschid mistakenley, when yonge Lowys dide 'borowe' mine manuscripte aftir youre laste visite to mine home in Kent and putten it on the internet for al his frendes. As yow wel knowe I had not yit finissed the drafte and it semed youre Lowys did maken sum chaunges to it, swich as removing my dedicacion to MY LORDE KYNGE RICARDE, that have putte me in a ryht pickel.

And, yf I recalle correct, yow have not yet made an apologie for thys sory matir to this daye.

--- JG


Anonymous richard, seconde of that name, kynge said...

It were bettir, maistre Gowere, that thou didst make full confessioun of thyn deedes, rather than declaring that swete and innocent youthes, that ben studying of the astrolaby, ben responsible for thyne wrongful and eville actes.

As for being in a righte pickle, thourte betwene myn legistres and myn tortureres. The choice, maistre Gowere, ben thyn.

This appele doth seeme to me to fail.

8:30 PM EDT  
Blogger Johannes Gowere said...


Yt sorowes me gretli thatte yow do not belef mine tale of wo. But ich do seye eft humbly in mine own defense that I have chaunged the thirde and folowynge draftes of mine werke the Confessio Amantis to retorne yow to the dedicacion.

And eek I did add mencion of sire Chaucere to the draftes evene tho yt peine me gretely to do the latter.

So humbli ich aske yow sire, to forgiv me thys sliht and considere thatte yf I mened to do yow harme, ich wolde not hav amended and republissed mine manuscriptes in swich a fashion.

youre servaunt,


ps yf it plees yow sire, yow sholde perhap meet yonge maistre Chaucere yourselve sumtime.

7:11 PM EDT  
Anonymous richard, seconde of that name, kynge said...

This is well done, maistre Gowere, but amendemente, though it ben a goodeli thynge, doth not yet amerce the original faulte. It beth most certainly trew thatte those who mean not harme to our sovran person would diligently correct their faults. Yet so mihte ane trechour out of policie. I ben nat yette persvaded by thyn humble suit.

It cometh to mynde thatte the beste and moste honourable amends do take the forme of goold and selver, and myne state costeth much to uphold. Mayhap some sergents and menne atte armes might visiten thee, thysse smale mattyr to discussen.

Else, thou mightst chusen still betwene myn legistres and myn tortureres, for they lack worke and Ich wolde nat have them bycome stale.

9:48 PM EDT  
Blogger Johannes Gowere said...

Dere sire my LORDE THE KYNGE,

Certes ich do not desire to make the aquaintaunce of thine lawyeres and men atte armes, so yf it plees yow ich wille make fine on thys matir atte youre courte in the maner that pleseth yow moste. For I do strongely desire bote of thys bale for oness and alle.

I muste finis sum business atte mine home but I purpose to wende youre waye soon to maken a profre for amendynge thys falt and ich wille submit myselve to yowre merci.

youre loyalle subget, JG

8:16 PM EDT  
Anonymous richard, seconde of that name, kynge said...

Whanne thatte thou comest to our courte, for goode Seynt Pancras's sake, chuse thee ane horse that be nat spavined. On thy last visit hereto, several frensshmenne did looke upon thyn nagge as if twere already in the potte.

Know thou, that the costoumes house doth provide our exchequer with a most lucrative and novrishinge reuenve. Verbum sapienti sufficit.

9:10 PM EDT  
Blogger Gwan said...

Ich eom richte sickke of kynge richarde. Lette us plotte to overthrowen hym and putte on the þrone Henri of Lancastre, the flour of chivalrie. It juste maighte worke.

10:34 AM EDT  
Anonymous henri de lancastre said...

Gwan, mayhap thou shalt with the maistre torturere a mitinge haue, forthat thou spekest tresovn gainst thyn lawfulle kynge. Ich shall neuer plotte tresoun gainst myn drede lorde and kynge. Yt has been prophesied thatte Ich shall a croisade maken, and dye in Jerusalemme whare dyed and was riborne our Hevenely Lorde.

12:39 PM EDT  
Blogger FSJL said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

1:49 PM EDT  
Blogger Geoffrey Chaucer said...

defensione meA

tua culpa,


1:55 AM EDT  
Anonymous The Mad Latinist said...

Ond eek pars prima.

Kenest thou nat, Iohannes Gowere, that Latin hath three gendres?

The Wykipedian sayeth: "Gower’s Latin poetry is well executed by medieval standards, with both vocabulary and prosody handled with competence." It thinketh me that this be "damning with faint praise." But it speaketh nothing to thy constrewals of noun ond adiective.

3:44 PM EDT  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

It semeth me that thise lettres ben forgeryes, for shulde nat oure lorde kynge ben composynge in Anglo-Norman French, else enforsynge some poore clerke to wryttyn his wordes in French or en Latin? Y knowe that myn auctor fauorite Iohannis Gowere knoweth seche thyngis as thyse. Y fear that his place hath ben vsurped as wel.

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